Day 13 and Day 14

Day 13 - A fictional book that is meaningful since your loss
Day 14 - A non-fictional book that is meaningful since your loss

I used to read every second I got...anything that I could get my hands on.  Sadly, I don't do a lot of reading these days, so I am going to hit both of these subjects in one post.  The reading that I have done since Gracie's death has been either professional in nature or subject matter than I cannot connect to her loss in any way.  There is, however, one small thing that I have pulled out a handful of times over the last year.  I am not sure if it would be classed as fiction or non-fiction...as much as it would be classed an inspirational combo of both.

About five years ago I was doing some genealogy research and stumbled (via Google) upon an excerpt from the book "Chicken Soup for the Nature Lover's Soul."  I had seen lots of Chicken Soup books, but I had never seen this one.  The excerpt that I had stumbled upon was about/based on my grandmother.  At that point, she had been dead for 20 years and this excerpt had been floating around for at least 10 years...yet I was somehow unaware that this publication existed, as was most of the family.

Although it is not entirely about my grandmother, I have pulled the book out and read the excerpt probably 8 or 10 times over the last year.  There is one phrase on the second page speaks to me in a very loud voice..."triumph of spirit."  I try to draw from that.  After all, that's what life after loss is all about, right?  Triumph of our spirits over the pain and heartache.  Triumph over what we so often feel can never be survived or conquered ....  Individual triumph that most of the world will never understand.  The pain of Gracie's death and absence will never go away, so it is up to me to handle it and manage it in the very best way I can.  It is up to me to let my true spirit triumph...and to let Gracie's spirit triumph in the most positive way I can (Although there are some days that the positive side of our spirits doesn't win out, these days are becoming much fewer and much further between).  Sometimes I think that much of my tenacity and somewhat unorthodox approach to the big events in my life...and my tendency to occasionally give life the finger (in the most refined manner, of course) was inherited directly from my grandmother.  As much as I hate it when people tell me that Gracie is hanging out in heaven with her great-grandmother, deep down, I have to admit to myself that they are probably right...

For those interested in reading this excerpt from "Chicken Soup for the Nature Lover's Soul," it can be found through this link...pages 92-96.