I'm okay.  I really am.  I'm not sitting here in tears.  I'm not sitting here trembling.  But I am sitting here in awe...to the point that I needed to write a short blip here. 

Today has been a good day.  It's one of those days that, while Gracie (and baby loss) plays at low volume in the back of my mind, she is not a forerunning or all-consuming thought.  I just came home for lunch, sat down and turned the t.v. on and found a rerun of Grey's Ana.tomy.  I haven't watched Grey's in a couple months, so how is it that, of all episodes, I turned the t.v. on just in time to see them finding no heartbeat on an ultrasound screen???  How completely random is this???   I've seem this episode, and I'll be fine, but shit.  It's all suddenly in the front of my brain, and I know from experience that it will stay there until I go to bed tonight.  Sometimes I wonder about  the timing and randomness of these happenings...